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Teacher Students
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#1
Tongue 
tow pupils were fighting outside the examination hall. the teacher came out and said : “why are you fighting?.
one student : teacher, he left his answer sheet blank.
teacher : why should that bother you?.
student: i too left my answer sheet blank.
teacher : so . . . . . ?
student : you will think that we have copied from each other.




teacher : i am extremely pleased to see the high grade you have achieved during these exams. i hope that you will continue achieving such splendid results.
student : sir, i can definitely achieve such high grades, if you again get the question papers for the next exam printed at my father’s press.



science teacher: dipu, which is the source of light to all the planets?
dipu : i don’t know, sir.
teacher : it is the sun.
dipu : but the sun will realize his mistake when he gets the electricity bill.




the teacher was examining ravindra’s maths answer sheet. he was very much surprised to see so many mistakes in the answer sheet.
“ravindra,” the teacher asked, how did you commit so many mistakes in your answer sheet?”.
“sir” , ravindra replied, “ i did not write the paper alone. my father helped me out”.



teacher : (to ramesh, a student). rames, what is the climate of australia?
ramesh : frozen cold, sir,
teacher : (in a very angry tone). who told you?
ramesh : sir, the food tins we receive from australia are always frozen cold.




raju : sir, elephants do not brush their teeth but why do we brush ours?
sir : elephants do not wear clothes, but why are you dressed?



teacher : prakash, now that you’ve kindly consented to come to school, what would you like to do?
prakash : go home.



teacher : how old is your brother?
student : how can i tell unless you tell me his date of birth?



teacher : how high can kangaroo jump?
brindu : as high as the qutab minar.
teacher : manish, do you think that brindu is right?
manish : well, i don’t even know that qutb minar could jump.



a nursery school teacher : ramu, tell a,b,c,d
ramu : why. miss, don’t you know the alphabet?



teacher : which of these two travels faster, heat or cold?
ramu : heat.
teacher : what makes you think so?
ramu : because, we catch cold.




the teacher (to shanker): what do you mean by democracy?
shanker : democracy means government off the people, far from the people, to buy the people.



teacher : gopi, which things lay more eggs.
gopi : sir, my arithmetic note-book.



teacher : george, give me three examples of the ape family.
george : mother ape, father ape and child ape.



teacher : raju, did your father know about your progress report? did you show it to him?
raju : yes, madam. he said, “you’re better than me”.


teacher : which is more useful, sun or moon?
ramu : moon, sir.
teacher : why?
ramu : because, the sun gives us light only during the day when it’s not needed.



teacher (to tom). have you heard of psychology?
tom : yes, sir.
teacher : where have you heard of it?
tom : here just now, and from you, sir.
கந்தல் ஆனாலும் தாய் மடி போல் ஒரு சுகம் வருமா.....வருமா...
சொர்க்கம் சென்றாலும் சொந்த ஊர் போல் சுதந்திரம் வருமா.... வருமா ...
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